Bitcoin Trading on the Space Station — Monitoring Prices via Satellite Network from the International Space Station

My name is Aleksey, a Russian astronaut.
In April 2026, I am on Day 189 of my mission at the International Space Station. The ground control center allows us limited internet access, but the latency is ridiculously high — about 0.5 seconds for signals to travel round-trip from the space station to Earth. That 0.5 seconds is enough for Bitcoin to drop $500.

My Holdings
In 2019, I bought 2 BTC with my ground salary, at an average price of $8,000. In 2024, I logged into Gate.io using satellite internet from the space station and saw BTC rise to $70k. My colleagues advised me to sell, but I said, “Wait until I get back to Earth.” Now, BTC is at $66,800, and I still haven’t sold.

The Most Thrilling Moment
On April 2, Trump announced “continue to strike Iran hard,” and BTC instantly dropped from $70k to $66k. I was performing spacewalks, and a price alert popped up on my helmet display. I almost loosened my safety harness — not because I was scared, but because I wanted to pull out my phone and place an order. Luckily, I kept my composure. Back inside the module, BTC had already rebounded.

April Challenge
Every day on the space station, I post messages like “From space, looking at Earth, I want to tell you: don’t worry about a few K-line charts. Earth is still turning, Bitcoin is still here, and your worries are just dust.” Each post includes the coordinates “ISS.” My followers have grown by 30k. Someone asked me, “How do you mine in space?” I said, “Come on, the station’s power is for survival, not for burning GPUs.”

Return Countdown
In 12 days, I will return to Earth aboard the Crew Dragon. My first act after landing will be to open my Gate account — not to sell, but to transfer all BTC to a new wallet, then have the private key tattooed on my arm. Because I never want to worry about prices in space again.

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