Trenchers keep saying "PEPE was launched in these exact conditions."

But you're leaving out the part that matters.
The degens who were holding $PEPE back then were GROWN MEN.
These were ~ 30y old men with actual income, actual patience, ppl who understood what it meant to BUY something and fking SIT on it.
The average holding time back then versus now is probably 100x longer and you can literally verify this onchain.
You can have the IDENTICAL market setup but it doesn't matter when the people playing the game are completely different humans.
A poker table with pros and a poker table with tiktok teens can have the same cards dealt,
The outcome will never be the same.
Now let's focus on onboarding NEW actual holders